Print Shop Stories
Miss Halloween
Beth was another of the company’s ladies of less than selective taste. (Yep, another slut.) She had slept her way to her current role a salesperson. This was a fact that she rather forthcoming about.
Beth was a very insecure woman. She had been very overweight and had starved herself down to what she deemed an acceptable weight before starting her “positions for a position” undertaking. She viewed this new career track as not only validation but as proof that she was better than her other co-workers. She gave us “common folk” plenty to gossip about.
She had a couch in her office. We all knew why. I’ve told you already, too. A couch is more comfy than a chair and you don’t risk carpet burn.
Beth was a complete disaster in the makeup field. She wore liquid makeup that was almost orange in color. She ruined three phones in the two years that I worked with her this way. The makeup would rub off on the bottom of the phone, the part you speak into, and couldn’t even be scraped off.
Beth took too much liberty on ‘casual Friday’. She wore the same pair of pants every week, though God only knows how they lasted through so much abuse. They were so tight in the crotch that she reminded me of a mail slot. Whenever she walked by I would wonder if I had paid my cable bill.
She also died her hair. One of the older guys, George, had a snapshot of her when before her ascension to glory. She had beautiful brown hair, wavy and very enviable. Since hitting the elite club, Beth had decided to blow-dry her hair out straight and color it black. I mean BLACK. Her hair was so black that it had a violet sheen to it. The combination of the orange makeup and the black hair made her look like a Halloween decoration. She looked like a crow perching on a pumpkin.
To be continued …
Previous post: Nekkid Noodles
Black hair and orange skin – it’s like an oompah-loompah gone wrong.
There is nothing to be gained from poor quality orange liquid makeup.
Thee who has makeup-line visible from the moon must be shot – or made over by Rikki Lake…in accordance with the prophecy.
Nyz xo:-)
LMAO!! 😀 (bad makeup scares me!)
great writing!! Made me laugh..
this is great – can’t wait to read the “to be continued.”
~layne
Bad makeup, tight pants, an unguarded entrance (so to speak)?
God, I love a good slut.
that sounds like my mother…..
wonderful mother!!
naw grandpaboy, that sounds like my cousin Beth. same name too… coincidence?
This post cracked me up!
Freaking hilarious!
That’s terrible…LOL.
hey, i’d uh.. like to meet this person ;p
You had me at…
“Beth was another of the company’s ladies of less than selective taste. (Yep, another slut.)”
Heh. Excellent writing! Thanks.