Movie Quote of the Day
When you first entered the restaurant, I thought you were handsome… and then, of course, you spoke.
– Helen Hunt’s character, Carol in “As Good As Gets”
Author: Jennifer Hogan
A young family moved into a house next door to a vacant lot. One day a construction crew turned up to build a house on the lot. The family’s six-year-old daughter naturally took an interest in all the activity going on next door.
She hung around and eventually the construction workers adopted her as a kind of mascot. They chatted to her and gave her little jobs to do and at the end of the week presented her with a pay envelope containing a dollar. She took this home to her mother, who said all the appropriate words of admiration and suggested that they take it to the bank the next morning to deposit it in her account.
When they went to the bank, the teller was equally impressed, and asked the little girl how she had come by her earnings. “I’ve been building a house this week,” she replied proudly. “Goodness!” said the teller. “And will you be building a house next week, too?”
“Yes,” answered the little girl. “If we ever get the fucking bricks.”
This is a breathtaking picture … check it out.
Movie Quote of the Day
I don’t wish him dead. But, should that occur… people die every day, why should he be any different?
– Meg Ryan’s character, Maggie in “Addicted To Love”
Gawd … This post is from one of my all-time favorite emails … If you don’t like profanity, skip it. This is a warning, so don’t bitch about it later …
LANGUAGE MEMO
It has been brought to management’s attention that some individuals throughout the company have been using foul language during the course of normal conversation with their coworkers. Due to complaints received from some employees who may be easily offended, this type of language will no longer be tolerated. We do, however, realize the critical importance of being able to accurately express your feelings when communicating with coworkers, therefore, a list of preferred new phrases has been provided so that proper exchange of ideas and information can continue in an effective manner without risk of offending our more sensitive employees.
PREFERRED: Perhaps I can work late.
OLD: When the fuck do you expect me to do this?
PREFERRED: I’m certain that is not feasible.
OLD: No fucking way.
PREFERRED: Really?
OLD: You’ve got to be shitting me.
PREFERRED: Perhaps you should check with …
OLD: Tell someone who gives a shit.
PREFERRED: Of course I’m concerned.
OLD: Ask me if I give a shit.
PREFERRED: I wasn’t involved in that project.
OLD: Its not my fucking problem.
PREFERRED: That’s interesting behavior.
OLD: What the fuck?!
PREFERRED: I’m not sure I can implement this.
OLD: Fuck it, it won’t work.
PREFERRED: I’ll try to schedule that.
OLD: Why the hell didn’t you tell me sooner.
PREFERRED: Are you sure this is a problem?
OLD: Who the fuck cares?
PREFERRED: He’s not familiar with the problem.
OLD: He’s got his head up his ass.
PREFERRED: Excuse me sir?
OLD: Eat shit and die motherfucker.
PREFERRED: So you weren’t happy with it?
OLD: Kiss my ass!
PREFERRED: I’m a bit overloaded at this moment.
OLD: Fuck it, I’m on salary.
PREFERRED: I don’t think you understand.
OLD: Shove it up your ass.
PREFERRED: I love a challenge.
OLD: This job sucks ass.
PREFERRED: You want me to take care of that?
OLD: Who the hell died and made you boss?
PREFERRED: I see.
OLD: Blow me.
PREFERRED: Yes, we really should discuss it.
OLD: Another fucking meeting!
PREFERRED: I don’t think this will be a problem.
OLD: I really don’t give a shit.
PREFERRED: He’s somewhat insensitive.
OLD: He’s a fucking prick.
PREFERRED: She’s an aggressive go getter.
OLD: She’s a ball busting bitch.
PREFERRED: I think they could use more training
OLD: They don’t know what the fuck they’re doing.
Screw it …
If Mitch can’t come to me, I’ll go to him. I’m off to Greensboro. I’m going to watch the Carolina game with him and make fun of his injury. 😉 It’s a 3 hour trip on way … wish me luck! I’m going to stay there tonight and come back home Monday around lunch … see ya then. Toodles! 🙂
Crappy Things About This Week
#1. My composition & biology mid-term grades are going to kill all of the A’s I got in my other classes… 🙁
#2. I miss my sweetie. He’s always working or at play practice. When he is home he wants to relax by playing computer games or by watching wrestling on TV.
#3. Mitch didn’t get to come down to stay with me this weekend. He broke three toes and dislocated his knee this week in a stair tumble.
#5. My mom called to tell me that my little brother broke his collar bone Friday night.
Best Things About This Week
#1. I got a pedicure on Monday.
#2. The last week before Spring Break.
#4. I went to Sonic today and had a Cherry Lime Ade and some of their kick-ass tater tots.
#5. I actually got some “action“.
More cynical thoughts from me …
There is a girl in my art appreciation class who dresses all in black and spouts out strings of sentences that make no sense whatsoever. (Things that, I’m assuming, must sound poetic when on at least one mind-altering drug.) She protests everything and drags around sketches of her boyfriends smoking pot. I guess by her talking about the evils of eating meat and the fact that she experimented with bisexuality that we will all be impressed by her obviously superior intellect and life experience. Then comes another string of similies about how life is like a really good soyburger … My take on it: The fact that no one understands you doesn’t mean you’re an artist.
Little Miss Showoff in Religion today decided to speak loudly enough to share with the entire class that some guy had told her about a fantasy he had with her in it. I thought: I’m already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
I got asked out today by one of the Eminem look-alikes. All I could think was: How about never? Is never good for you?
Site I Am Addicted To …
I love the daily questions from Casual Observer’s page … they get me thinking and I love seeing everyone’s answers.